The Unforeseen Benefit of Frugality

I may have embarked on frugality out of necessity rather than choice, but there has been an unforeseen benefit to my new frugal life. One that I wanted to share because I think what often holds us back from taking those first steps to changing our financial position is how we assume it is going to look or feel.

Frugality vs Deprivation

I never thought of my budget as depriving myself, more spending purposefully…

Or did I? Maybe that’s not true, maybe when I first created my budget and I looked at my tiny monthly clothes allowance, and my one bought work lunch a month budget, and what I had allocated for my one dining out experience a month, maybe it did feel like deprivation.

It seems like such a long time ago now that I sat down to create that first budget, although it was only the end of 2022, I almost forget how I felt. Other than scared that I was genuinely going to run out of money and not be able to afford to pay my mortgage.

So maybe it did feel like deprivation… Maybe I did look at my budget and think that my life was going to be sad and boring… but I didn’t cry over it because I knew how serious the situation was. Deprivation or not, as far as I was concerned, I was doing what I had to. And the motivation was strong enough to make the decision non-negotiable. It wasn’t a choice; it was a necessity.

The unforeseen benefit of Frugality

The funny thing is though, 15 months later I can honestly say, whatever I thought back then, it doesn’t feel like deprivation now.

Truly my life feels full, fun and anything but sad.

And that is part of the unforeseen benefit. How can my life feel fuller and happier when I am doing and spending less?

I think it’s because I enjoy the things I do spend my money on so much more now.

When I buy an item of clothing now I take my time. I enjoy browsing. I look for pieces that I truly love and that compliment my existing wardrobe. I deliberate over my choices and am more discerning with my purchases – I don’t just buy everything because it’s in the sale and I’m saving! Now I shop for quality (and I don’t mean designer or expensive, I mean pieces I truly love) over quantity. I shop infrequently, I take my time, it’s a pleasure. And when I do buy something I consider where I am going to wear it first and I love putting it on.

When I go out for lunch or dinner with a friend I relish every moment. I enjoy the experience of getting ready and driving to whatever café or restaurant we have chosen. I luxuriate in my friend’s company, I put my phone away and engage in our conversation. I savour every mouthful that has been cooked for me and the experience of being served. I take my time. And I am grateful for every moment.  

I do all these things exactly because it is not a daily or weekly occurrence.

I also look forward to it all week. And research shows that anticipating an event can be almost as enjoyable as the experience itself. Numerous studies, including research in the “Journal of Experimental Social Psychology,” show that looking forward to something can lift your mood and lower your stress.

(I mean there’s a reason, apart from capitalism, that we have Christmas advent calendars and countdown apps for our next island holiday)

If you do something two or three times a week, do you look forward to it? Or do you take it for granted?

Would Christmas be as special if we had a Christmas every month?

Would hot cross buns be as delicious if we ate them all year round?

Do we enjoy holidays because they’re amazing or because they’re infrequent and we work all year for them?

This is a really good question to ask when thinking about the RE part of FIRE. Lots of people return to work after retiring not only because of the meaning work gives our life, but also because weekends aren’t as much fun when you’ve been home relaxing all week! (Apparently… I mean I am quite happy to test that theory)

I wasn’t doing any of the things I now limit in my budget anywhere near 3 times a week and yet I still took them somewhat for granted. Whereas now I don’t. Now I anticipate and savour every dinner out, every lunch at work I don’t have to make and every item of clothing I buy.

And that’s not all…

Actually there have been other benefits to my new frugal life, besides the anticipation of treats and enjoying occasions and spending my money more (and of course the obvious benefit of saving enough to now have investments!), such as seeing parts of Napier and Hawkes Bay that I had never seen before! Because I have been actively seeking free or cheap places to visit I have discovered the delights of places such as the museum, Napier city library and our local art galleries, as well as the beauty of our local beaches, waterfalls (have you been to Shines falls?), walks (Bell Rock is an absolute must) and regional parks (Pekapeka is next on my list). All of which you can visit for $0!

I have found cheap and fun alternatives to going out with my friends, such as pot luck Saturdays and podcasts and cuppa nights. And I feel as though I have created stronger connections with my friends because of it – it is amazing how much more you talk about on a long walk, or during a quiet evening over a bottle of wine rather than a night out in a noisy bar or surrounded by earwigging people at a restaurant.

Frugality isn’t the killjoy we all think it is.

The first step to Frugality

My advice would be start ‘small’. Don’t start by going hardcore and cutting everything you love out of your life (unless of course your financial position is such that you need to!) Because if your new frugal life has nothing you love or look forward to that really will feel like deprivation, you won’t enjoy it and you will never stick to it.

Start by cutting down on something ‘expensive’ from 3 or more times a week or a month to just 1. So if you currently eat out 3 nights a week try cutting that down to 1 and seeing how it feels. Or if you currently buy your lunch for work every day, try cutting that down to once a week and packing your lunch on the other days – Fridays work well as mini celebrations for making it through the week! If you currently spend $300 or more a month on clothes, try cutting it down to $100. That might mean you buy nothing one month and the next month you have $200.

At the same time start to think about what you can do instead. So if you usually buy lunch out at work every day consider making extra for dinner, that way you have delicious leftovers you can take to work with you – or prepack a few salad jars like these. Or if you usually catch up with the girls at a bar, suggest drinks at home instead, you choose the music and everyone brings a different something to nibble. Or if you normally go shopping with your Mum to feel connected, suggest a walk at your local park instead.

Find alternative, free (or cheaper) ways to do the things you look forward to so that you don’t feel like you’re missing out and end up falling off the wagon. The idea is to create a life that feels more full not empty, fulfilling not lonely, and frugal not deprived.

And be flexible with your new found frugal ways! If you have decided to treat yourself to lunch on a Friday, but your work bestie asks if you want to go for a goss over smashed avo on a Thursday, don’t say no. Or if you receive invites you don’t want to miss twice in one week, say yes to both and then skip your treat the following week.

When I sat down to create that budget in the December of 2022, afraid for my financial future, I never foresaw the additional joy and gratitude I would experience from a more frugal life.

Give it a try, you never know you might like it. And what have you got to lose from trying it for a month, or two?

You might be surprised about the unforeseen benefits.

Amy

XO$